So I''m not going to lie, getting "Let Go" really sucks. I say "Let Go" because every article I read on how I should be feeling says that the term "Fucking Fired" is a bit to harsh. "Onward and upward" they say or some total bag of shit statement like that seems to be what the so called experts think is best for my mental state right now. So as I wake up every morning now trying to justify my existence in this world, I surf the internet on how exactly I should be coping with this total fucking screw job situation I find myself in.. No wait. I believe the term is "New Beginning". It appears that I could go one of two ways.. The first is to try and deal with it by viewing the glass as half full. Look at this as an opportunity to explore life and all the wonders it has to offer...Sorry, I just threw up a little in my mouth. Or the other way to go is to just fucking hate the world and everyone in it. For now I'm going to choose this path. For those of you who know me, not a big shocker I'm sure but for me, this just seems like the logical path. As I sit here typing I already feel better about myself. So here we go. I dedicate this series of Blogs to those assholes who make me say, "I Can't Even".
1. Unwarranted Dog Petter Asshole:
Here's the deal. Just because I have stepped outside my home with canines by my side so they can get some exercise and do their business doesn't mean you can REACH OUT AND TOUCH MY DOGS WITHOUT ASKING. It’s just kind of rude. If my dog comes up to you, I get it, I’m not going to be a dick because they’re social animals, but for all you know this Sheppard Mix and Jack Russel Terrier could not like you or people at all. So now if you smell like bacon or a cat and my dogs decides to take a bite or run you over, I've now become a lawsuit waiting to happen. If I see a cute animal that I want to touch, I’d simply say to the owner “Cute dog! Do you mind if I pet him/her?” It’s that simple. I CAN'T EVEN WITH YOU PEOPLE.
2. The I Can't Wait For You To Get Off The Elevator Asshole:
Can we all agree that these people need to Chill the fuck out! I promise you’ll get where you’re going. The idea is, we get off first and that gives you more space when you get on. It’s a fucking common courtesy! Don’t be an impatient asshole. SO LET ME GET OFF FIRST. I CAN'T EVEN WITH YOU PEOPLE.