Mashable- Look, you’ve probably figured out by now that the new Fifty Shades Darker film hasn’t received the most positive reactions from critics. But it seems some people rate it rather highly. See, a cinema staffer randomly found a cucumber lying in an aisle following a Fifty Shades Darker screening. The folks at the Hayden Orpheum in Sydney, Australia found the veg, snapping the photo and posted it on Facebook. “That awkward moment when you find a cucumber in the cinema after a session,” the cinema wrote.
While it might be easy to dismiss this as a marketing stunt, according to Alex Temesvari, the cinema’s Deputy General Manager, the discovery was absolutely real. “Hand on my heart, it was actually found after our Student Night session of Fifty Shades on Monday night (actually by me!),” he said via email. “Otherwise I would totally take credit for it being a clever marketing ploy, but honestly we’re not THAT clever.”
2 possibilities here. #1 we are looking at a health conscious movie consumer who doesn't want to deal with all those calories that come at the concession stand OR we are dealing with a professional freak who enjoys getting off with fresh produce in public places. Either way, what in the fuck is this guy doing holding it without any gloves on? Are you kidding me? Who would walk into a theater after a showing of 50 Shades, stumble upon a cucumber and go, "well look at that. I best pick this up and take a photo of it." Are you insane? Their is no amount of Purell or Ajax in the world that can undo whatever is on that pickle.
My god I thought the freaks in Florida were bad. Apparently they don't hold a candle (or a cucumber in this case) to the freaks in Australia. Moral of the story here, Fifty Shades of Grey brings out the freak in people. Next time you want to hit the same old bar fellas looking to drag something home caveman style at 2am, buy a ticket to this gem and see if you can spot the cucumber in the crowd.